Parenting as a Spiritual Practice

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom" – Aristotle

I’ve been sitting here trying to find a definition of spirituality and personally, I feel that’s like trying to define a colour to a blind person. It’s so subjective. But then I found the quote above and this feels like a start.

So many people associate spirituality with religion and whilst spirituality is a part of religion, it is possible, I think, to be religious without spirituality.

For me, spirituality is about the search for ‘self’.

Who am I? (Yep… the big question!)

What makes me tick?

Why do I react like I do?

What are my programs?

How do I change my programs?

Where do Love, Kindness, Courage etc fit into my life?

Am I living in alignment with my values?

Heck, what are my values?

And, to be perfectly honest, I started asking these questions 20 years after leaving religion. I started asking them when my children were born!

Seriously, being a mum has been the biggest learning curve of my life – although learning to walk and talk and all the other things we learn as babies comes pretty close!

And, as if becoming a parent wasn’t enough on its own, throw in a good long dose of depression and see what happens. (Doing things the hardest way possible is another pattern I’ve just realized I have!!)

I know that parenting is such a crazy busy time in life that it is easy to say “I’ll tend to my spiritual practice later” but actually, parenting IS spiritual practice!

When your kids are pushing all your buttons – practice patience.

When the calendar is bursting with the family schedule and you have no idea how to add one more thing – practice surrender.

When everybody in the house is losing their cool – practice breathing.

When your child is going through something that you just can’t fix because they have to face it – practice listening.

When you get it wrong and act in a way you’re not happy with – practice asking for forgiveness.

When you feel alone and overwhelmed – practice asking for help.

Everything that happens in our lives isn’t happening TO us – it’s happening FOR us.

Everything is an opportunity to grow.

I know it can be emotional, intense, and messy, but there really are spiritual lessons everywhere for us.

And, if you think you need to have it all together for your kids, you don’t. When they see you stuff up, get things wrong, ask for help, and say sorry, then they get to know how to handle themselves when they get things wrong.

So, I think Aristotle has it right – knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. And parenting is a powerful way to get to know yourself!